PAGE TWENTY-ONE
21/1
[ The next day ... ]
At the breakfast table.
Steve: “Have you ever tried a threesome?”
Laura: “Oh, for christsake!”
21/2
Steve: “I’m just asking.”
Laura; “And I’ve asked you to stop talking on the subject.”
21/3
Steve: "It’s not like I want the normal male threesome fantasy. This would be something for you.”
21/4
Laura: “I don’t want it!”
21/5
Steve: "But It would be just like having two of me. Wouldn’t that be great?”
PAGE TWENTY-TWO
22/1
Steve: “In fact, why not three, or four, or more of us?"
22/2
Laura getting angry.
Laura: "Grrrr!"
22/3
Large panel.
Laura: “I don’t want any filthy ‘roaches looking at me! I don’t want them touching me, or even living in the same apartment building with me. I don’t like ‘roaches!”
22/4
Silent frame, Laura and Steve both still, and a little stunned.
22/5
Steve: “So that’s how it is then.... I’m filthy?”
PAGE TWENTY-THREE
23/1
Laura: “No, no. Sorry. Not you … just your friends.”
23/2
Steve: “This works the other way you know. You humans aren't as clean as you like to think”
23/3
Laura: “I don’t think of YOU as filthy, Steve. Honest.”
Steve: “No. Just my entire species!”
23/4
Laura: “It was just a phrase.”
Steve: “What, like the phrase 'frigid bitch'?”
PAGE TWENTY-FOUR
24/1
One page of Laura losing it and swatting Steve with a magazine.
Laura: "DON"T CALL ME THAT!!!!"
(SPLAT)
PAGE TWENTY-FIVE
Lots of small panels on this page. 3x3 or some other format.
25/1
Laura holding still, the magazine in place, not wanting to look under it.
25/2
Slowly lifting the magazine ...
25/3
... and peeking under it.
25/4
Laura running to the kitchen sink...
25/5
... and throwing up in it.
25/6
Laura slumped on the floor near the sink, crying. Head in hands.
25/7
Similar to 6.
25/8
Looking over at the table where she killed Steve
25/9
Back to crying.
PAGE TWENTY-SIX
26/1
[ Laura cleaned the table top eleven times ... ]
Laura scrubbing the table with steel wool and a bottle of industrial strength cleaner. There is an obvious patch on the table that is now so clean it is a different colour from the rest of the table.
26/2
[ ... and stayed inside for three days eating ice cream, sobbing, and watching trash tv. ]
Laura sitting on a couch watching tv while eating ice cream, with a packet of tissues close by, and lots of used tissues everywhere.
26/3
[ Like so many of her relationships the end had come suddenly and unexpected. ]
Lying on the same couch thinking.
[ She wondered if Steve's friends would seek revenge... ]
26/4
[... so she started carrying a can of heavy-duty bug spray with her. ]
Make sure there's always a can of bug spray near her in all the remaining panels.
26/5
[ But she never saw any cockroaches. ]
26/6
[ Not one. ]
PAGE TWENTY-SEVEN
27/1
[ Her mother rang, asking her if she wanted to come over for Sunday dinner. ]
Laura on the phone. From the phone comes a speech bubble.
Phone: “What’s wrong, dear?”
27/2
[ Laura confessed to relationship troubles. ]
Phone: “Plenty more fish in the sea.”
[ Her mother always said that. ]
27/3
Laura reading a magazine, but looking away from the page, thinking.
[ But then again ... ]
27/4
[ Laura hadn't seen a single bug since ... the breakup. But she knew they had to be there. ]
Laura holding a can of bug spray, walking determinedly to the kitchen.
27/5
[ Hiding. ]
Wider panel. Laura in the kitchen, looking around.
PAGE TWENTY-EIGHT
28/1
[ Steve hadn't been so bad. ]
Laura shaking the can.
28/2
[ He'd just been a little fixated. ]
Laura crouching down on the kitchen floor.
28/3
[ In many ways he'd been the ideal boyfriend... ]
Wide panel showing the view from under the fridge out into the kitchen, where Laura is on her hands a knees looking, the spray can in her hand.
[ ... the problem had been that she'd lost the initiative in the relationship. ]
28/4
[Just like that book Steve had slept under said ... one type of flower should always be the centerpiece of an arrangement, or a relationship. ]
The book that Steve had slept under, reprised.
28/5
[ She just had be the main flower. ]
Laura on the kitchen floor, shaking the can again.
Laura: "I know you are all out there... "
28/6
Laura: " ... and I'm guessing you can hear me ... understand me."
PAGE TWENTY-NINE
29/1
"You all know what I have to offer ... "
29/2
"... and you all know what I'm capable of."
29/3
Large panel to finish showing Laura with a somewhat evil smile, pointing the can at the gap under the fridge.
"Well have I got the deal of a lifetime for one, and only one, of you!"
###END###
There you go. A love story (of sorts) between a woman and a cockroach. It's a script without a home, like so many others on this blog. So if there's an artist out there who's interested, drop me a line.
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